|"Oh hai! I'm just hanging out with my mermaid-esque cascading locks of gorgeousness."|
|"Why yes, I will appear in your shampoo commercial, slowly swinging my hair back and forth."|
|Or even, "This? Oh, yeah, totally natural. I'm just lucky, I guess."|
This morning, I got a message from my hairstylist/friend, indicating that she now does hair extensions. I had never thought of doing this before - thinking it was something out of reach, like couture gowns or Creme de la Mer (note: why does every starlet use this $500 face cream? Can any skin cream possibly be worth that much?)
But it's kind of a known secret that every famous person with gorgeous hair uses hair extensions (except for Kate Middleton. That thing you saw in that picture one time was a SCAR, okay? Her hair is TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY NATURAL and please don't arrest me, The Queen).
I did some investigation - for the high quality human hair extensions my hairstylist uses, it costs about $600 to get 18" extensions or $450 for 12". And then you have to go back every 8-10 weeks for $120 maintenance appointment. This means basically, $1000 hair.
|WORTH. EVERY. PENNY.|
I know like, objectively? This is insane. I would have to be crazy rich to spend this much on fake hair. But then on the other hand, you wear hair every day. This would mean I would have super amazing hair for a FULL YEAR. And if you divide $1000/365 that equals $2.73 per day. Which is totally reasonable, right?
But, couldn't I save $1000 by, you know, growing out my hair? Maybe. And isn't it possible that my extensions would wind up like a gank weave as seen on the more tearful women on America's Next Top Model? Potentially.
And then I was like, "...um, what you have is CRAZY DEBT and you are a CRAZY PERSON for even CONSIDERING THIS."
|I totally understand why Britney shaved her head. That mess looks CRAZY UNCOMFORTABLE.|
Le sigh. So, in the end, I had to listen to the sensible angel on my shoulder and get long hair the slow, old-fashioned, more boring, less glamorous and less expensive manner - growing out my hair.
But if in a year I don't have luscious mermaid locks? Then I will SERIOUSLY CONSIDER EXTENSIONS. You are warned.