|I am a plant killer. Always have been, always will be.|
It is my evil reverse super power.
So, I have a total black thumb. It's hereditary - mother (unintentionally) kills all plants unlucky enough to be in her care, as do I. I've even killed cactus plants, which are supposed to be durable and you don't have to do anything to them.
|Maybe the plants all die because I spend more time on my gardening outfit and makeup than actually watering them? #justsayin|
So anyway, since it's spring and plants clean the air and look pretty, I picked up a few new plants for myself today.
Meet Hepburn's new friends:
|Medicinal aloe plant, spider plant, and THE MONEY TREE!|
It's really called a Money Tree! When I saw this plant in the plant store, with its braided trunk and funny-shaped leaves, it looked somehow familiar to me. Wait a minute, I thought to myself, I've already (unintentionally) killed one of those before!
I had inherited my former roommates' Money Tree when we moved and it (for no discernible reason) died as soon as I became its owner. Because I'm not sure what to do with it, the old Money Tree is still dead in a pot in my kitchen. It's going to like, compost or something, right?
|The in-your-face symbolism of the Dead Money Tree I keep in my kitchen.|
Seriously, you guys, I am like plant kryptonite.
But is this why my money situation is so dire that I've had to appeal to the internet itself to help me pay for my cat's surgery? Because of the bad feng shui of having a dead Money Tree lurking in my apartment? It's a total feng shui situation! This site says if you tend to your Money Tree and keep it lush and thriving and keep it in the money corner of your house, you will prosper and thrive like the tree!
Where is the money corner of your house? The southeast corner, according to this other website. I don't know which part of my apartment that would be (I'm equally terrible at directions, hand/eye coordination, willpower, and taking care of plants) but I've put the Money Tree on a windowsill where there's a bit of sun but not too much. (The tag said it likes shady spots)
Will this bring me wealth and prosperity? Or at least, will my plants last through the summer? Only time will tell...