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Day 314: In which I become a glasses person


*Note: not my family. But if it were? I'd be the little cute one with no glasses.

I used to think I was the lucky one in a family of glasses-wearers (one of my sisters started wearing glasses when she was like 2 or something - hi MEF!). I didn't have or need glasses at all until one fateful day in Grade 5, when I mentioned to my mother that everything was blurry out of one eye, but not the other. One trip to the eye doctor later confirmed it - I needed glasses... in my right eye.

I was a very creative kid, and thought seriously about getting a monocle or something, but wound up with a pair of 80stastic plastic tortoiseshell glasses (OK, what I really wanted were cat-eye 50s style glasses, but this was the early 90s and those weren't available at the time). I only later found out how narrowly I'd missed THE LAND OF EYEPATCHES - where the totally uncool Grade 5 kids had to live. I think that because I only mentioned the blurry eye thing at age 10, I'd passed the point where an eyepatch would have done anything. THANK CRAP.

*Note: If I'd known that eyepatches could look this cool, 10-year-old-me may have not been so freaked out at the prospect. But it was the early 90s, and eyepatches were decidedly UNCOOL.

Fearing the tyranny of a flesh-coloured eyepatch-related decrease in popularity, I used to spend a lot of time closing my good eye, to "exercise" my bad eye. When out babysitting, I would watch entire episode of Dr Quinn Medicine Woman through my blurry eye as "exercise." Plus, Sully was totes dreamy.

No idea what Sully saw in prissy Dr. Quinn. But at least it brought him to my TV screen every Friday night.

Anyway, I was instructed by the eye doctor to wear glasses, but just at school. This was insane advice - school was the one place where I had to look as good as possible. Like I was going to wear glasses in front of cute boys, I mean, c'mon. Not that I wore them at home, either. I just wasn't a glasses person (I was, however, a glasses LIAR who set off to school, wearing glasses, and then took them off a block later - read more about this sad time in this olde poste).

This glasses deviousness continued throughout my junior high years, when I graduated to being the sort of person who had to wear glasses all the time. This lent itself to OMFG moments like being out with my friends at the mall and running into my Mom and having to be like, "Oh, heeeey! I just totally took my glasses off because it was so sunny, I had to change into sunglasses, then I remembered I didn't have any sunglasses and here I am, no glasses, hahaha."

Because squinting is always cooler than glasses.
Or so I used to think. OK, Clint Eastwood is always cool.

Finally FINALLY my thrifty parents let me get contacts (THANK YOU OH MY GOD!) when I was in high school. I still only had one blurry eye, so for awhile I only had to wear one contact lens. Eventually, my poor left eye began to degrade as well and I wore contacts for years and years and years. Glasses were only for when I slept in and didn't have time to put in my contacts.

Which brings us to OCTOBER 2011. The month in which I vowed not to spend money on anything besides groceries. The month in which I ran out of contact lens solution. The month I wore glasses everyday.

I tried to channel my inner Tina Fey and werq the glasses.
I guess it helps that I'm already a librarian.

So, the thing is, I used to be the sort of occasional-glasses-wearer who would get dressed up awesome, then put on the glasses and suddenly look 10% less awesome. But during October, I began to realize that with my awesome glasses (Derek Cardigan 7002! SO CUTE!), I could get dressed up awesome, add the glasses, and INCREASE how cool I look.

*Note: this is not me. But this guy is wearing Derek Cardigan 7002 glasses.
Picture them on me. So cute, right? SO CUTE!

And I've bought more contact lens stuff, but I've been wearing my glasses almost everyday lately. And I don't take them off when I look at myself in the mirror (like in the olden days, when I hated how I looked in glasses). I don't know if this is a frugal win, but not having to put in contacts for sure saves me a precious 45 seconds every morning, 45 seconds I can use to sleep in a little bit more.

Plus, glasses are totes frugal. Esp. since the ones I'm wearing that I love I totally GOT FOR FREE (OK, $14 shipping) from Clearly Contacts. (Check them out, they have free glasses sales practically every month. Don't worry about ordering glasses online, either. Just choose a gigantic, nerdy pair and assume you'll look awesome. It worked for me!)

4 comments:

Michelle P said...

I wish glasses looked good on me! I wear contacts everyday and they tend to hurt my eyes.

~Carla~ said...

I don't have either, but I'd totally go with the black cats eye gasses if I ever needed them! lol!

centsofacountrygirl said...

I wear glasses everyday and have since I was eight. I get a new pair every two years, but keep my old ones as 'work' glasses to wear when I'm in the barn or working outside. I am going to try Clearly Contacts next time I buy a pair of glasses.

The image of Sully throwing his tomahawk will forever be held in my heart.

okgirl said...

I'm wearing my glasses right now! Which is unusual...I normally don't even wear my glasses in the morning until I put in my contacts--I just stumble to the bathroom and put them in first. I do have adorable glasses, I just have such *terrible* eyesight. Everything outside of the glasses (like that all-important peripheral vision) is a blurry wasteland. Turning my head all day every which way exhausts me.

BUT--inspired by you, I've been trying to wear them more. I'm saving up for eye surgery (that crappy vision prob extends to my crappy thin corneas that can't have LASIK, so I have to spring for the 3x as expensive surgery. Prima donna corneas!) and wearing disposable contacts every day is NOT getting me closer to having enough for the knife.

Scalpel. Laser. Whatev.

If you can slay the overdraft, I can turn my head some more. (Plus, I mentioned they're super-cute, right?) Sacrifice is *so* hard.

Reminder to self:
Glasses = $13.98.
And that money is already spent, so it's fuh-ree.
Contacts = $1/day, every single day. Not counting solution. Every day I wear them, I'm $1 farther from perfect vision.

Thanks for the awesome reminder!

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